~~
I loved them and they, too, loved me. They were my masters and they treated me as they would their own children, although they did not have any. There was a day when I smelled something strange in the garden, something that smelled metallic. I was cautious as I sniffed it and called my master over. He dug up the object and carried it into our home with mistress. It turns out it had some weird rocks in it, but the couple seemed very happy. Who knew that humans liked rocks that much? For some odd reason, from that day on, I dined like a king. They gave me meat at every meal and life was great.
Later on, I was in the house minding my own business until I sensed a fleeting feeling of murderous intent. I searched for the source but I couldn't pinpoint it. I gave up looking for it and went to check on my masters. It turned out that the neighbor was over. From first sniff, I could sense that he was smarmy. Apparently, he wanted to borrow me to look for some more rocks.
And so I went with him for a day or two. I basically just lazed around for a bit and one day, I found the BEST treasure in the world. It was a bag of bones. I was so excited. I was about to grab it until I heard the swing of axe and a loud thump. Darkness.
I didn't know what happened but all I remember was running away and trying to get the attention of my master, but he didn't reply. It turned out the neighbor man killed me and pretended it was a natural death. I was livid and wanted revenge.
Over the next few days, I found ways to pay back my master before I left. I helped him obtain gold and treasures from a tree and the great Daimio. Luckily, the villainous neighbor was stupid enough to try to get the same treasures. He ultimately failed and was thrown into jail. Whilst he was in jail, I haunted him each and every day and nearly drove him mad. After he was released, I found him homeless under a bridge. I turned myself into a venomous snake and bit him to death. Good riddance.
It looks like I fulfilled my goals on this earth.
~~
I took one last glance at my master as a tear fell from my eye. My conscious is slowly fading and a bright light is growing behind me. I have done what I needed to do. Goodbye, my precious master.
Ghost dog.
"Ghost" by Kitchiki. Source: DeviantArt.
That little prologue was a really interesting way to start the story. It caught me and made me want to read more immediately. At first, I didn’t realize that the story’s narrator was a dog. That made for an interesting first few sentences. It surprised me a bit that the dog’s goal was to get revenge on the man, but it definitely worked as a good motive!
ReplyDeleteWow Michelle, I love the way you write! It’s so unique and such a creative approach. I like the amount of detail I feel like you intentionally left out in order to create more mystery. I really enjoyed your story. I think if you added a little more detail about how you became captive or if you’re an animal or not? It’s not totally clear but again, maybe that was intentional and I enjoyed the mystery.
ReplyDeleteI liked the way you wrote this story. The word choices are excellent and the whole thing looks professionally written. I liked the prologue and the last sentence epilogue. It added an element that makes it look classy. The whole thing felt really personal and that stood out to me. It didn’t see an author’s note so I don’t know what the original story was but great job nonetheless.
ReplyDeleteHey Michelle!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed the way that you wrote the story. The language and sentence structure really made it seem like a dog and not a human, so well done! One thing that the other people also mentioned was that there was no authors note and I would have really liked to see that in order to know what the background of the original story was and to give further insight to it. Other than that your writing is very good so well done!